I remember it clear as day. It was our first meeting as the Harbor team. It was here in this meeting that I was surrounded by my fellow summer staffers, two work crew workers, a couple of interns, and one man who stood out among the rest of us. After taking one look at this gentleman I could tell he had so much joy to share with us he couldn't contain himself. I now know it was because this man, Brooke Payne, was well aware of how much of a blessing it is to get a chance to spend anytime in Malibu club, Canada.
After all the introductions and greetings were out of the way, it was Brooke's floor to say what he had to share with us all. It was here at this moment I was given the message that sets up my entire retelling of the biggest lesson God poured down on me during my time at Malibu. He told us how he had been to Malibu many times, but never once has he ever gotten back on the boat heading home an unchanged man. Than, as if that foreshadowing truth wasn't enough, he added that his hope for us all during this month was to learn true trust in the Lord.
The Harbor team minus our interns Emma, Cody, Kelsey, Kramer, and Cody
Harbor team with our lovely interns but minus Casey and Brooke
So, lets catch up real quick, its day one at Malibu and I've been told where I am right now is a place that has countless times changed this man, whom has everyone around him showing expressions of thankfulness just for his presence. Also, it's day one and I have already been presented with my first challenge to learn to fully trust our father. Take note, this will be a reoccurring theme.
I firmly believe God is teaching us always. In every moment of every day, he is gradually pruning us so that we may bare fruit that brings him glory.However, I also believe there are seasons in our lives where he is chasing us even harder so that things will come to fruition in us that we ourselves never thought possible "But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ have crucified the sinful nature with its passions and desires. since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the spirit. Let us not become conceited, provoking and envying each other." - Galations 5:22-26
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The reason I started these blogs about Malibu was to share that my time at Malibu was one of these seasons. In this season God changed a lot in me. Needless to say, as Brooke forewarned me and my fellow staffers, I got on the boat leaving Malibu Club, Canada a changed person. I guess, now is the time to begin sharing the story that brought all of this full circle.
On our last morning in Malibu I woke up early to finish the final details of packing up and leaving for home. Little did I know, on this dreaded day of leaving this, “Thin place,” God was going to hit me with the ending to a lesson I'll never forget. However, I can't share the ending until the rest of the story is told. Therefore, please stick with me until we get back to this part of the epic journey the Lord took my heart on.
Now I must backtrack and provide a little background information, if you've read my Mother's day blog or know me at all, than you should be well aware that my mother passed away this past October 16th. Its key to start here because her heart and mine will always be, to me, one in the same. Since this past month was a journey of my heart, it has her involved and intertwined within its depths. I love and miss you much mom, thanks for the memories, good and bad.
A few days after mom passed, I decided I needed something to carry with me to always remember her by. As soon as I started thinking of what that could be, it came to me, “Did mom have any cross necklaces?” I immediately went to her bedroom and made a b-line for her jewelry box. I wasn't confident that I would find a cross necklace or any piece of jewelry I'd be interested in keeping with me, mainly because I'd never seen her wear one. However, I pressed on and opened up the top and went through the draws. Than there it was a rustic, faded gold cross. It was buried beneath a few rings and what looked like the world's most tangled silver necklace. It was no taller than a quarter and had the diameter of a thick rubber band. I immediately fell in love with it and knew that from that day forward I would wear it in honor of Ruth Nixon, my one and only true mother.
After I went to a local store and found a modest gold chain to rest it on, I placed it around my neck and there it was to hang everyday forward, I would never take it off or so I thought.
Here's the Cross
Let's fast forward to a little bit before leaving for Summer Staff in Malibu Club, Canada. In order to get out there I had to fly for the first time ever in my life, and this wasn't a little flight either. I had to travel across the United States of America, a concept unimaginable to me a mere five or six months earlier. This was something I never thought I would do until I was at least a good ten years older. God had taken my whimsical decision to apply to Malibu and brought it to fruition through his great sovereignty. He gotten me accepted and sent and was about to send me on the ride of a lifetime. I'd say this is where all the experiences of Trust got started because this kid was scared to fly, let alone fly over 2000 miles.
Fortunately, I had my best friend Zach Mccord coming out to Malibu with me, and he had flown many times before. He was like my own little version of the holy spirit comforting me by leading the way through all the craziness we call airports, which I must say flew by, no pun intended. I hardly even remember being at any of the airports we were at. However, there is one airport I do remember just about every detail of and that was the Minneapolis airport. The reason being was at this layover on the way to Seattle God hit me with the first major moment in my heart's journey.
Back in the Pittsburgh airport, I went through my first ever TSA security checkpoint. Here I was, nervous and overwhelmed by the prospect of flight and getting all my carry on luggage through the checkpoint without having to get a cavity search. Okay, I wasn't really concerned about being cavity searched but the possibility of it happening made me nervous. With all these thoughts running through my head I was shedding my shoes, removing all the metal I had on me, my watch, my mom's cross, and so on. I distinctly remember taking my watch and the cross and stuffing them both in a chest pocket of my black, fleece Columbia jacket, safe and sound.
I went through all the first flight jitters with flying colors (pun?), and made sure my eardrums didn't rupture by frantically chewing gum on both the ascension and descension of the flight. Yes, I was legitimately concerned about my eardrums rupturing because I study audiology and know too much about ears. Before I knew it, we had arrived in Minneapolis and were briskly walking through the crowd to our next flight. I was both ecstatic and flustered because I was in the hometown of my favorite NFL team, the Minnesota Vikings. Yet, I needed to pay attention and make sure we caught our next flight. Than, as we were still pushing through the crowds, I thought to myself, “No more TSA checkpoints! I can put mom's cross back on.” So I reached for my coat pocket and saw a horrifying sight.
The zipper of the pocket was wide open. Hopeful, I reached in to see if by some miracle the necklace had stayed in the pocket that must of been open for our entire flight and the 500 yard sprint we had already made from when we first reached the terminal weaving through person after person. Empty, gone, no chain, no necklace, just an empty black hole that had failed to hold onto to the one thing I had left of my Mom's which I considered dear to me. Sorrow began to pour over me, I continued to press on and told myself I'd find it when I sat down to wait for our next flight. As soon as I arrived to our bench, Zach had already headed off to a close by convenience store to get a drink. Thus, I began to search my carry on bag and every crack, crevace, or hole I could find on my jacket and clothing. Once again, nothing, no necklace. I now realized it was gone and gone forever.
Okay this one is getting a little long winded so this story will be continued in the next post. Sowwy :)
please finish the story!!!
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